It finally hit me last night...I was the biggest failure I had ever encountered. After 3 months of being back home and job hunting till my fingers bled (figuratively speaking) I was no further than where I had first begun. I had in my possession a degree from an esteemed school and no current or future job prospects other than the one I am at. I find myself extremely disappointed and not just a little less than short of despair.......definition: I have cried about my lack of a career more than once. But last night I think I hit a spot where I have not previously ever found myself. I was a failure. Upon further evaluation, (I love saying that phrase) I regarded myself as the biggest failure I have ever had the pleasure of meeting. I had sent out numerous cover letters, had many interviews, all to no avail. Why couldn't I climb that ladder?
Don't get me wrong....I am not suffering...far from it to be exact. I have a job at a upper-class restaurant that provides me with what I need. Yet, who with a four-year degree likes to say "Oh I work at a restaurant that I've been working at for the past 4 years"? How is that respectable? I read what I have just written and I sound like I'm having a pity party...and maybe I am. I really shouldn't be, given the economy, I really am lucky to have a job.
Yet, I still can't help but bemoan my poor sorry little self. I should probably disclaim this is not me begging for a job or me trying to appeal to you for some morsel of a job contact.
This is me just blogging about my job hunting experience....my future....my whining....whatever you would like to call it...this is me just relaying my experience.
I've come to realize I measure myself, my success and my failures through other people's binoculars. I assume another's view of myself and that is what, for me, determines my ultimate verdict. I don't ever ask myself what I think success to me means. I don't ever ask what value to me means.
A stockbroker may think making 100+ a year is a success.....whereas a doctor may think saving a life is a success...and a teacher may think teaching a child to read is a success. But what do I, Michelle Ashley Hipps, think success means? I find myself lacking an answer and maybe, for right now, I have to keep trudging (like Chaucer in a Knight's Tale) to find an answer. Maybe for me, it's to go back to school and learn more....maybe it's to keep blogging, as I love to do, till I somehow spin up an answer. Whatever the case may be, I doubt I'm going to find it at a restaurant that pays me what I need....maybe I need to be lacking to find it. I'll let you know if I find it.
How to treat a girl..
Got this via email and I kept saying "yes!" after every point so I thought "screw it I'll just post it on my blog." So enjoy.
1.Whatever you do, don't just show up at their house...they run around in their underwear just like we do.
2. Don't cheat on them. It may seem foolproof, but girls tell each other everything about everything. Trust me, they WILL find out.
3. Beware of every single male relative and all guy friends. Any of them would kick your ass at the drop of a hat, and a lot of them wouldn't even wait for the damn hat.
4. Never miss an opportunity to tell them they're beautiful.
5. Don't refuse to kiss in front of your friends. If they laugh at you, it's because they're jealous.
6. If they slap you hard, you deserved it.
7. Don't be afraid to touch them if you want to. If they're going out with you in the first place, it's because they like being in your arms.
8. If you don't sleep with them, do not tell your friends that you did.
8.5 If you DO sleep with them, don't tell your friends that you did.
9. You can be dirty minded in private, really...most of them are not offended by it...
10. Not all of them eat like birds, alot of them can eat like whales.
11. Most of them don't mind paying half of everything, but they do discuss these things with their friends. Realize that if you make your girlfriend pay half all the time, everyone will know about it and your friends will know you're a pussy.
11.5. Do you honestly need all your money that much? Be a man, pay all the time!
12. Every girl should eventually get three things from her boyfriend- a stuffed animal, one of his sweatshirts, and a really pretty ring. Even if it's not a serious relationship.
13. Make sure she gets home safely as often as you can. If you're dropping her off, walk her to the door. If you aren't dropping her off, call to be sure she's home safely.
14. If a guy is bothering her, it is your right to kick the crap out of him.
15. If you're talking to a female friend of yours, pull your girlfriend closer.
16. Never, ever slap her, even if it's just in a joking way. Even if she swats you first, and says, "Oh, you're so dumb" or something, never make any gestures back.
17. Go to a chick flick once in a while. She doesn't care whether you enjoy it or not, it just matters that you went.
18. You're dead meat if you can't get along with their pets, parents and best friends. Be prince charming to their friends, Mr. Polite to their parents, and make sure to be nice to their animals.
19. Don't flirt with their moms...that's just freaky.
20. Don't be freaked out by PMS. It's not gross, and it really does make them feel like crap, so be understanding.
21. If you don't like the way they drive, you do it.
22. If you're officially dating, and you're introducing her to your friends, you'd better damn well introduce her as your girlfriend.
23. Don't stress where you go for every date. They really only want to be with you.
24. If they complain that something hurts, rub it for them without being asked.
25. Girls are fragile. Even if you're play fighting/wrestling, be very gentle.
26. Memorize their god damned birthdays. You forget her birthday and you're basically screwed for life.
27. Don't marinade the cologne, but smell good.
28. Don't give her something stupid for her birthday or Christmas or Valentine's day. It doesn't have to be expensive, but it has to be meaningful.
29. If you think the relationship isn't going to last, don't wait to find out. It will only hurt you more if you draw it out.
30. After you've been dating for a while, realize that they really have started to trust you. When you have a girlfriend who truly trusts you, you have a lot more responsibility, privilege and control than you would think. Be careful with it, most guys would kill for that kind of power, and it can be lost in a nanosecond.
1.Whatever you do, don't just show up at their house...they run around in their underwear just like we do.
2. Don't cheat on them. It may seem foolproof, but girls tell each other everything about everything. Trust me, they WILL find out.
3. Beware of every single male relative and all guy friends. Any of them would kick your ass at the drop of a hat, and a lot of them wouldn't even wait for the damn hat.
4. Never miss an opportunity to tell them they're beautiful.
5. Don't refuse to kiss in front of your friends. If they laugh at you, it's because they're jealous.
6. If they slap you hard, you deserved it.
7. Don't be afraid to touch them if you want to. If they're going out with you in the first place, it's because they like being in your arms.
8. If you don't sleep with them, do not tell your friends that you did.
8.5 If you DO sleep with them, don't tell your friends that you did.
9. You can be dirty minded in private, really...most of them are not offended by it...
10. Not all of them eat like birds, alot of them can eat like whales.
11. Most of them don't mind paying half of everything, but they do discuss these things with their friends. Realize that if you make your girlfriend pay half all the time, everyone will know about it and your friends will know you're a pussy.
11.5. Do you honestly need all your money that much? Be a man, pay all the time!
12. Every girl should eventually get three things from her boyfriend- a stuffed animal, one of his sweatshirts, and a really pretty ring. Even if it's not a serious relationship.
13. Make sure she gets home safely as often as you can. If you're dropping her off, walk her to the door. If you aren't dropping her off, call to be sure she's home safely.
14. If a guy is bothering her, it is your right to kick the crap out of him.
15. If you're talking to a female friend of yours, pull your girlfriend closer.
16. Never, ever slap her, even if it's just in a joking way. Even if she swats you first, and says, "Oh, you're so dumb" or something, never make any gestures back.
17. Go to a chick flick once in a while. She doesn't care whether you enjoy it or not, it just matters that you went.
18. You're dead meat if you can't get along with their pets, parents and best friends. Be prince charming to their friends, Mr. Polite to their parents, and make sure to be nice to their animals.
19. Don't flirt with their moms...that's just freaky.
20. Don't be freaked out by PMS. It's not gross, and it really does make them feel like crap, so be understanding.
21. If you don't like the way they drive, you do it.
22. If you're officially dating, and you're introducing her to your friends, you'd better damn well introduce her as your girlfriend.
23. Don't stress where you go for every date. They really only want to be with you.
24. If they complain that something hurts, rub it for them without being asked.
25. Girls are fragile. Even if you're play fighting/wrestling, be very gentle.
26. Memorize their god damned birthdays. You forget her birthday and you're basically screwed for life.
27. Don't marinade the cologne, but smell good.
28. Don't give her something stupid for her birthday or Christmas or Valentine's day. It doesn't have to be expensive, but it has to be meaningful.
29. If you think the relationship isn't going to last, don't wait to find out. It will only hurt you more if you draw it out.
30. After you've been dating for a while, realize that they really have started to trust you. When you have a girlfriend who truly trusts you, you have a lot more responsibility, privilege and control than you would think. Be careful with it, most guys would kill for that kind of power, and it can be lost in a nanosecond.
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